03.08 - 25.08

3 - 4

Have been thinking about textures and the hellishness of the small and minute.  How from the right angle and with the correct amplification I am able to distort the ordinary into something larger and more epic.  A summary of all the things I can't put into words but which are always present.  The intuitive recognition I feel for a wordless thing that chews on us all.  It's not about death, but what is around and beyond and within life.  The Always Enemy.  The Clutch.

The Clutch will leave our bones strewn across the pavements, crunching them into scrunches.  Making us into the fixity of concrete.  Happy graze.

5 - 6 

Went out for a day trip with my relatively new friend, Timothy.  Took some charcoal and drew some pictures.  Here are my best two pictures.  They look much better in digital form.  Less smudgy.

Instead of making landscapes my idea was to focus in one on very small aspect of the ground, find something horrible and gross in the shapes I see and somehow extrapolate that out of the image.  It is arguable as to how successful this was.  I really like the first image.

 7 - 9

Facebook is an interesting tool for communication and self marketing.  The person that I need to market myself to the most (arguably) is myself.  Social media is a fact of life these days and a tool but also something which has become ingrained in ourselves.. almost like a body organ, in the same way that your house keys are.. or how people who drive are in effect cyborgs when they are inside their car.  Somehow it becomes part of your living mechanism.

So if you have the same profile picture and background too long, I feel that part of you starts to degrade and become predictable.  In order to reinforce and develop your statement of yourself to yourself (and to everyone else) I need to develop myself through updating and experimenting with facebook profile pictures/layouts.

This one is meant to have a Lovecraftian feel to it.  Or like a BBC 1980s adaptation of a Lovecraft story.  But at the same time it shows my propensity for self satire.  I don't care much whether I am good looking on Facebook... in fact I hope I am the opposite.. though I'm probably not.

The above is can essentially be summarized as "I like changing my facebook profile picture"

 10 - 11

Much pattern designing and money saving being done on my time off work.  Though it is easier to save money whilst I am at work... but not easier to pattern design.

 12 - 13

Sent this to my friend Ana as an early birthday present.  As I learn more and more photoshop collage tricks then the whole need to spend money on someone's birthday is becoming less and less worthwhile.  At least an unwanted jpeg is not going to create any clutter.

 14 - 16

Fun with felt tips and a visit back to Doncaster:

 17 - 18

I always look back on my large scale gallery sized installation and wonder if I will ever get the opportunity to make anything so immersive again... also if I can make that in a location where more people will see it.  I am glad that I didn't waste my first solo exhibition on an opportunity to show some pictures and that I tried to do something different, tiring and ambitious... though the problem may be that I just didn't have the right location/marketing to really make much of my ambition.  Is it wrong and dirty for an artist to admit they want to be successful?  In this ironic age wherein we all stand around toothlessly acting as if we are not interested in recognition?  When any arrogant statement has to somehow have an undercurrent of humour.  Is that really self awareness?  Or is it self containment?  Embarrassment?

On a less embarrassing note here are some close ups of pattern designs I'm quite pleased with:

 19 - 20

Another new profile picture....  seems like I need to reinvent myself very quickly.. I must stagnate very quickly too.  Judging by the smell I think that is an accurate statement:

This one is based on old classic sci fi book covers.  Also the cheapness of old paperbook covers and novelizations from the 70s and 80s.

Found this gem whilst researching this:

Also as an aside note, a product with one of my patterns on it is mentioned in this blog.

21 - 23

Due to my vast amount of annual leave I've started to feel the part time freedom that an artist should have and have been able to have plenty of time to get everything done without feeling any stress.  So I've been stressing about other things instead.. like having to go out clubbing for a friend's birthday.  It was okay though and quite a pleasant evening (ish).  

The highlight of the evening was taking this photograph.

David Lynch meets Tron.

Here are three more photos from during the week.

The first being a close up of some plant growth... the second being a small doll that used to belong to Noel Fielding but has somehow found it's way into my flat... and the third being my previously cream blazer that I have dyed a lilac colour because I have 3 cream blazers already.

Finally here is a picture of me and my best friend Claude.  He is enjoying his cuddles as usual.  I think he is enjoying them anyway.  I don't have my picture taken with him very often so think this is a good one to share.   Also it shows off my new lilac jacket.

24 - 25

My last two days off.  I wrote myself such a large to do list.  When I don't get enough done I don't feel as if I am fulfilling my potential.  I always feel like there is so much more for me to do.  That I am lazy and underachieving.  Maybe it;s because I don't live up to my ambitions.. or my ambitions are impossible.  So I slacked off the entire to do list.. except for making a picture.

Even though I've done a lot of pattern designing and selling of work etc this year this is the first image I've made on canvas.  I was planning to make larger work again when I am 35.  Using new printing methods and working towards a new stage of collaging.  This was a slight dabbling in that.  The idea is to be able to build up images faster using pre aligned patterns/images.  Make them less of an abstract gloop and more of a directional architectural location.

Oh... almost forgot.  Another noteworthy thing happened.  I sold one of my abstract gloop images from back in 2012... one that I never imagined I would ever sell.  This one:

Somehow it looks a lot better than I remember it looking.  Though I'm glad it's not living behind my furniture anymore.  Here is a blog entry on this picture if you want to read about it.

22.07 - 02.08

22-23.07

I've been embroiled in a bobble hat design contest for the last few days.  The deadline is 15th August.  I am thinking that if I design 100 bobble hats then they are sure to pick at least one of them.  Not sure but perhaps likely.... though I do wonder if maybe it makes it less likely.

"Who is this psycho who sent us 100 bobble hat designs?"
"Whatever you do, don't encourage him, don't let any of them win."

I am wondering if I should cut my designs down to 50 or perhaps 30... but contain within each design several colour variants... so I will be submitted 200 designs in the guise of 30 designs.

It is an enjoyable project and allows me to use Microsoft Paint again.

24 - 26.07

Through conversation sometimes ideas are developed.  Perhaps the faster the conversation the quicker the ideas are developed.  I have difficulty keeping track of ideas or where they came from.  Some ideas happen years after.  Slow ideas.  Some never happen at all.  I have an idea for a stage performance which utlizes a photocopier.  I would photocopy clothes and pieces of skin.  All essential aspects of my exterior personality.  The things that we use to sell ourselves.  The reason why some people are completely unengaging is due to the fact that the way they choose to sell themselves is bad. Sorry if that sounds superficial.  This law extends beyond the physical and in the way that people talk and behave.  If their lie isn't even believed by themselves then that lie isn't worth telling. There is a crack in their projection showing the screaming useless baby underneath.  They are inadequate at dealing with the challenges of the world.   Anyway, my stage performance would be a way of stripping away all my weapons and defenses.  Almost a form of psychic suicide... wherein all exterior boundaries are disintegrated and all that would be left at the end would be bones.

"Hey, did you hear? Garth Simmons is dead?"
"How did he die?"
"I don't know how that goofball freak did this but, hey, I gotta tell ya. He managed to cut himself into one of his own collages. Started out by flaying all the skin from his body and cutting and stapling it to the walls all random and shit. Then I guess he just lay down on the floor and started cutting out his internal organs. Throwing them all over the pavement... someone told me he was throwing about his intestine for a few minutes... trying to make sure it landed in the right shape. I guess it was his last ever piece of artwork"
"Was it any good?"
"I didn't really see it well... too many ambulances around it... but what I did see it just looked sort of like all his other work."
"Poor fella.... Gee whizz.... I'll sure miss throwing stones at that pasty faced goofball. So this erm.. last piece he made... makes him seem kinda... well... I dunno... self indulgent? Serious?"
"Yeah. Maybe. I just reckon that boy needed to eat more vegetables."

27 - 28.07

29 - 30.07

11 months and 2 days left

 

My budgeting plan is going well... or that's what I like to tell myself.  I think at the end of this I might be a really fancy and elaborate suit... and/or get my teeth done.   I think the only way to celebrate 12 months of intensive budgeting is to be very extravagent at the end of it.  Either that or carry on budgeting for another year or two and then buy a house at the end of it... or invest what I've saved in the stock market.

31.07 - 02.08

I created a folder of folders of image files and each folder is rooted back to one single final folder wherein the final pdfs are going to be stored... all directions through the folders lead to the final folder. The source of my objective is the eventual conclusion. Working backwards from the future. Careful planning. Organization. Architecture. Whoosh! Circular trajectory.

I reach the end of my bobble hat design contest.  All work has been submitted.  I took a photo of one of my designs on my phone.  It was a photo of my computer screen.  It ended up looking like this.  All 3D and exciting.  The lovely thing about technology and art is that things accidentally feed from one thing to another... so my 2D hat patterns can now become very exciting 3D geometric designs.